I have already fallen in love with far too many postage stamps
When you appeared on my doorstep wearing nothing but a postcard promise
No, appear, is the wrong word..
is there a word for sucker punching someone in the heart?
Is there a word for when you’re sitting at a bottom of a rollercoaster Is there a word for that? You can only fit so many words in a postcard It’s hard to build a body out of words Instead of ..holding your head to my chest Instead of holding my hand Repeat the same mistakes over and over Is there a word for the moment you win tug of war Is there a word for that I want to say it
And you realise that the climb is coming
and you know what the climb means
and you can already feel the flip in your stomach from the fall before you even moved
There should be
Only so many in a phone call
Only so many into space
Before you forget that words are sometimes used for things other than filling emptiness
I have tried
We have both.. tried
I tell you about the boy who lives downstairs from me
Who stays up all night long practising his drumset
And neighbours have complained.. they have busy days tomorrow
But he keeps on thumping through the night
convinced, I think, that practise makes perfect
You tell me about the sandwich you ate for lunch today
How the pickles sit so perfectly with the lettuce
Practise does not make perfect
Practise makes permanent
You don’t get any closer to Carnegie Hall.. even I know that
Repeat the same mistakes over and over
You don’t get any closer
You never get any closer
When the weight gives
And all that extra rope comes hurtling towards you
How even though you’ve won
You still wind up with muddy knees and burns on your hands
I wish there was
when we’re finally together on your couch
And neither one of us with anything left to say
Hoping that some mail man somewhere will track you down
And recognise you from the description in my poems
And he will place a stack of them in your hands and tells you,
“There is a girl who still writes you”
She doesn’t know.. how not to.
- Sarah Kay








